A Good Parents Empower Their Kids

Good Parents Empower Their Kids And All The Rest Enable
Although we were raised in the same household, my brother and I had very different childhoods. Sometimes I have to remind myself of this when I get frustrated with him. I feel like as an adult he should be able to take care of himself, pay bills, and be responsible and respectful. The problem is that he was not only enabled throughout childhood, but is continuing to be coddled by our mother and other relatives. As sad as it is for him, this fact gives me more ability to be a mother in such a way that prevents my children from being doomed to be dependent as an adult.
It's a very common situation. Parents want to take care of their children, it's a natural impulse. But it seems like many mothers misunderstand what it truly means to raise their children. You can't expect a child that has never had any responsibilities to grow into a responsible adult. Mothers especially fall into this trap. It is a vicious cycle, really. They feel like their child can't do something so they do it for him, but by not allowing him to try he never learns. The child that learns how to take care of himself feels empowered while the one that is taken care of feels incapable.
There will be times parenting that I fall into this trap, I'm sure. As a mother it is natural instinct to care for and nurture mychildren , I want to make them comfortable and happy. By remaining conscious of what will happen if I let this get out of control I am able to step back and let the kids try. If they do need help I will be right there to guide them, and they know that. But I know that guidance is all they truly need. I am committed to raising capable responsible adults.
Sometimes the children make this harder, as they can intuitively sense my impulse to jump in. I cannot count the number of times I've heard them ask, "Help please, Mommy," and I have to remind them that they know how to accomplish the task at hand. I am convinced by at least ensuring that they attempt things themselves and know that they are capable I am empowering them to feel strong and capable for the rest of their lives.
As parents used to tell their children on a regular basis, I won't always be around to take care of my kids. There may even be a time in the future that I need them to care for me. Regardless, I know it is my priority to raise capable children , ones that are contributing members of society. In order to contribute, they need to first be able to care for themselves. By allowing them to face life's daily challenges head-on while I whisper encouragement in their ear seems the best way to help them grow to meet this expectation I have set for them. One thing is for sure: my children are not enabled. (article taken from : www.readbud.com )